Mike and I : Part one

This marks to start of a series called Mike and I. I'm not sure how long it'll be, I;m sort of winging it. Hope you guys enjoy it. 

Part One : Anger Management 

Mike and I once encountered a rather angry gentleman. We asked the chap what it was that vexed him so. He replied “I’m so angry I smaak to hit walls” to which Mike replied “Walls? As in more than one wall? surely one wall would be enough to deal with whatever anger you have to deal with.” Seeing that the young man was clearly confused by Mike’s question, I intervened. “Mike I think this gentleman is referring to the metaphorical walls we all put up to keep each other out.” It was at this point that the distressed youth punched an actual wall. Mike and I agreed that investing in property in Parow would never be profitable as chaps walking around hitting the walls left, right and centre would without a doubt decrease the resale value of any home built in the area.  

Coloureds explained entry 4:"Dala rot" and "Bets".

Today on coloureds explained we will explore two words that are intrinsically linked. "Dala rot" and "Bets". Bets is when someone is up for a challenge. This could range from agreeing to helping your friend move into his new flat to helping your friend hide the triple homicide he's just committed. A dala rot is said to always be "Bets" but the reference is not generally linked to mere furniture mo

ving. When a dala rot is bets it’s generally for kak aanvang (see last post). Common Dala rot activities include but are not restricted to: hurting himself for others amusement, breaking things for no reason, driving unnecessarily fast, doing everything in excess, fighting with little or no justification (see upcoming post on, "the rol"). They do this for the simple pleasure of hearing people say “You a mal naai ma bru". The older one gets the less impressive the dala rot becomes, when you 14 we call him a dala rot, when you 30 you call him an idiot. Unless you yourself are an idiot then you call him "the ou" (see next post on coloured superlatives).

Coloured's explained, entry 3: "Getuie"

This refers to a good friend. e.g., Michael Michael Shakib Bhatch is my getuie ma bru, tot laat toe papa," translation: "Michael Bhatch is one of my dearest friends till the day I die." Now to many this may seem a bit extreme but calling someone a getuie comes with many responsibilities. He has to join you in all manner of "kak aan vang", lend you money (kyk

a liewe, see entry 2), help you "chys kinnes" (approach girls, see extensive note to be published later for elaboration), the list is extensive. All these supportive acts can be lumped using the verb, getuig. When asked to getuig, an individual is being asked for help or support. This can range from serious issues to the most trivial of requests. e.g. " Ma bru I'm gonna stab this naai, u gonna getuig me?" to I'm going to the shop gou, getuig me?
If the getuie does not comply with the more serious requests he will be denoted to the role of "bang naai" (scared) and will no longer be seen as a getuie. For smaller infractions you can be called a kak thing or fokol werd.

Coloured's explained, entry 2: "Kyk a lewe

This is when an individual asks another for a favour. In the scenario Fiekie is a bit strapped for cash and as a result cannot afford to buy a ticket to the ballet that he had so looked forward to attending. He then asks his mate Gamat so "Kyk a lewe" and buy him a ticket. Gamat has been put in a precarious situation as the rules of being "Brasse" clear

ly states that if said bra finds himself in a bind it is your duty as his "getuie"(to be explained in entry 3) to help him out. There is another instance whereby saying the words constitutes the entire communicative act and explanation for the statement is not necessary as both participants share schemata that allows them to understand. This is shown when Gamat asks Fiekie to kyk a lewe while Fiekie is smoking his "wit pyp" (see entry on recreational drug use), Fiekie immediately knows that this means Gamat wants a few drags.

Coloureds explained : Entry 1

So i've been given some good advice to move my musings on coloured slang onto a blog format. Here is the first entry:

Dala: Verb, this could make reference to a sexual act. E.g. “I dala'd that kin last week”, in the form of a question dala asks the recipient of the message whether he or she has completed a particular task. The question does have to have some schemata shared by both parties for it to be fully understood though. When asking his friend whether or

not he got the tickets for the upcoming Symphony Fiekie asked Gamat “Did to dala" as if” Did you buy the tickets”. Dala in the instance of the now popular saying " Dala what you must" speaks to a more sinister origin whereby two men who are involved in a quarrel would antagonize each other by saying the phrase meaning " Do what you have to do" to which the intended reaction would be of a violent nature. This saying has however morphed into a more humorous connotation meaning “Do what you have to; I'm just going to chill out here"